We're just 300 short days away from the wedding!! For the last couple of weeks I've been wanting to do a wedding update and this seems like the perfect day for it. After our
initial struggle to find a venue, a lot of major pieces have fallen into place beautifully.
As I was thinking through all the things I wanted to write about in this post, I started to wonder why I hadn't felt any of the stress/anxiety/pressure/hatred/insanity that seems to accompany stories of wedding planning. With the exception of the venue, everything else has seemed, well, easy. And I also know we're 300 days away, so there is still time for plenty of freakouts, but then I thought, "well, duh, Caroline!"
Let me share an excerpt of my Myers-Brigg personality test:
"Outgoing, gregarious, usually quite direct, and very upbeat to be around, ESTJs see the world in terms of hands-on, practical, realistic situations. Those perceptions are translated into objective, non-personal, analytical decisions and freely imposed upon anyone within earshot {
you're welcome!}. Likes and expects practical facts and details presented in logical order. Valued communicator will tend to be precise, literal, objective and clear. Decisive, quickly move to implement decisions. Organize projects and people to get things done, focus on getting results in the most efficient way possible."
Ah, there's the rub! Wedding planning plays into my natural strengths of organizing and making decisions quickly. While John insists there are some negatives to this personality type (
eh hem, 90% Judging preference), I have yet to see them. If you believe that, let me show you some of my ocean-front property.
Psychoanalytical Hour is over, so let's move onto the fun stuff.
The Dress! I actually bought my wedding dress more than a month before we chose the venue or set the date. My mom came to visit for my birthday during the middle of April and we went shopping at a big bridal outlet (a large store, not necessarily for large brides, though they didn't discriminate). Going into the store, my dream dress was Melissa Sweet's Dora, which I loved because it was traditional with a fun twist (the swiss dot fabric). Even though I feel like I need to put a big black box over the chest area in this picture, the sweetheart neckline was one of my favorite details.
We had a very helpful sales lady, who, even though I had a general idea of what would work for me, really helped us narrow down styles. There were a couple of promising dresses, but none that made us "puddle up." And we're big puddlers. Even more than not crying over any of the dresses, none of them felt like me. I felt like I was playing dress up in someone else's dress, and I didn't feel like a bride.
The next week, I had Good Friday off of work and I saw online that a small boutique in Durham,
Tre Bella, was having a sample designer sample sale. Like any good engaged couple, when we prioritized our wedding (budget), the dress wasn't near the top of mine, so I had pretty much written off all small bridal designer boutiques, but the "all dresses $500-$1,000" sure got my attention.
Side note: At sample sales, the store sells their floor samples as-is and at deeply discounted prices to make room for new dresses. One of the best things about them is you get to take the dress home right then instead of waiting up to four months for an ordered dress to arrive. The dresses are all in average sizes and might have typical signs of wear since many people try them on. If you're close to average in size and height, sample sales are definitely a good place to start a dress hunt.
I arrived when they opened and I was blown away by the beauty and quality of the dresses. Three young sisters, the bellas, own the store and each brings a slightly different ascetic to the collection. The Wedding Industrial Complex was right on this one; from the styling, fabric, and construction, you can tell a big difference in designer gowns.
I selected three and headed back to the dressing room, literally a huge room with chairs and couches good for ohh-ing and ahh-ing. I wish I could describe the first and third dress, but I can only remember that the first one was pretty but without the special something and the third one was matronly because all my mental capacity was spent on the
second dress!
Oh, the second dress! The Manuel Mota dress was everything I was looking for. Classic, A-line, modified sweetheart neckline with a fun something special, beautiful Douppioni silk, figure flattering (didn't make my look like a linebacker). Best of all, though, for the first time, I felt like I bride. The bride I wanted to be walking toward John, the best version of myself.
It was a little weird to be at the store by myself, but I am so thankful for camera phones and that I had gotten to try on dresses with my mom the week before. I called her up, sent pictures, described it to her, and she said "go for it!"
I whipped out my credit card, nearly elbowed a girl away from
my dress (old soccer habits die hard), and texted John "I bought my dress!" Well Mr.-30-Minutes-to-Order-Dinner (not that I judge or anything) was so alarmed that he up and called my mom to check on my mental state!
Because let's be real, at 10:00 I walked in the door, and at 10:42 I walked out with a giant pink garment bag, which is a little unheard of in bride-world. But I just saw it as the result of efficient decision-making.
On the way home I couldn't stop smiling, calling 25 girlfriends (didn't know I had that many!), and
staring in my rearview mirror, eh, I mean, envisioning the dress. I tried it on two more times that evening, and I got to model it for my grandmother the next day and my parents a few weeks after that. I've looked at hundreds of weddings since then and haven't seen another dress I like more than mine.
I definitely found my dress.
Well, I was a little too loquacious tonight, so I will update the rest of the planning checkmarks throughout the week.
